There is a firestorm brewing in the Black community. Actually, it is not new; it has been smoldering for quite some time. It is the war between the sexes – i.e., the skirmish between Black men and Black women.
What is bringing it to the surface is a number of high-profile incidents wherein certain Black men have been accused of wrong-doing. These include the late Michael Jackson, R. Kelly, and the late Kobe Bryant, among others. The one thing they all have in common is an interview process that included Oprah Winfrey or Gayle King.
These women have been vilified for agreeing to conduct interviews regarding the alleged Black perpetrators of wrongdoing. Because of this, an “Oprah/Gayle” meme has come to personify the hatred and destruction of Black men.
Now for a question: have you heard of ‘gangsta’ rap’ wherein rappers continuously call for the disrespect, murder, and rape of Black women and girls, and where they are routinely referred to as b*tches, thots, and hoes? Back in the day, our esteemed elder, C. Delores Tucker, was disrespected because she opposed that trend.
Black women have been demonized and degraded by Black rappers for many years. It is no surprise, therefore, that Black women are now blamed for the lion’s share of the problems in the Black community. Misogyny is alive and well in America, and especially in Black America. Gangsta’ rap has played a major part in creating this malevolent view of Black women.
Concurrent with this trend is another one, questioning why Black men are under general “attack.” This question is surprising when considering DECADES of the same toxic music saturating the airwaves that continuously, even to this day, calls for the murder, hatred, and disrespect of Black men by EACH OTHER!
It’s curious that people would then ask why the mayhem is happening. It’s a no-brainer; it’s a case of self-programming.
We can blame the police for some of the homicides, but they aren’t the only ones who are killing Black men. Black men are killing each other at alarming rates, and gangsta’ rap plays a huge role in this situation.
The sad truth is that our community has participated in creating a toxic division between men and women, and people don’t seem to notice that we ALL are suffering, i.e., Black women, men AND children, as evidenced by the extreme violence and dysfunction in our communities.
Black men blame Black women for raising children by themselves, and Black women blame Black men for abandoning their families and for a seeming lack of responsibility.
Actually, we all share some of the blame for the state of our communities, though the issue is very complex.
We must first look at the beginning of our experience in America. Black people were trained to disrespect one another. Black men were used as breeders and families were routinely dismantled to serve the economic needs of slave masters. The men were consequently psychologically castrated because they were not able to protect their women and children.
Black women, on the other hand, have been overly protective of Black men because they were aware of the danger that they faced at the hands of overseers. This protective behavior continues to this day. This is why there is a reluctance to renounce misogyny directed against them and why they are often quick to attack other Black women who cast aspersions on certain aspects of Black male behavior.
The cycle continues when Black children, especially boys, end up in female-headed households where there is a resentment of females, partly due to the stress of single-parenthood. This is a simplistic explanation, but it provides a loose framework for how we ended up in the gender wars.
Black men and women need to wake up and unify against the malevolent forces that are conspiring to tear us apart, and we need to understand the part that we play in it!
We need each other! If we don’t unite, we’ll keep blaming each other until we no longer EXIST!
A side note: the breakdown of the Black family and the deepening of the Black male/female sociological fissure is one of the most cogent reasons for demanding reparations. Even though that is the case, we must ultimately understand that NO EXTERNAL OPPRESSOR CAN SUCCEED IN OUR DESTRUCTION WITHOUT OUR PARTICIPATION AND CONSENT!!! A Luta Continua.
