The Chatterbox

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By Ima Gontellit, Chicago Crusader 

KEEPS GETTING BIGGER

We hear that with one person about to drop out of the upcoming Chicago race for mayor, now two more is fixin’ to high tail it onto the ballot. One is a white gal and the other is another brown-skinned person who was up in de club saying, “why de hell not!” In de meantime, the Negro operatives who’ve sold out their community for streets named in their honor, ball fields, contracts, front row seats to the gay pride festival and a whole trove of trivial stuff, are laffin’ real hard ‘cause they believe all other candidates put together could not defeat De Tiny Emperor next February.

-Ima-

FOLKS BE COLD

One girdle-wearing chick over at Shady Rest was cacklin’ bout her nephew who said he was totally “disgusted” by a local media personality who was “on Facebook in a fetal position” crying like “he was crazy.” The downside: When asked, the boy told his old auntee that the person’s parent had died. The upside: Ain’t watching people make a fool of theyself a part of this social media stuff?

-Ima-

“Doc” Walls

SKIN IN DE GAME

One has to wonder why do de Perennial Candidate Doctor Walls keep running for public office just to “make a point” no one seems to get? Well at least this time, he picked the governor’s race rather than running for City Hall.

-Ima-

PRIDE MONTH

We hear one local female minister is being pushed by her “loving one” to come out of her walk-in closet and tell de whole wide world about their same-sex romance. People in the congregation who are telling these women’s business, claim the two met in Bible Study when the female preacher was finally given a chance to conduct one. Another gossip say people ought to be able to tell the two got something going on other than heavenly fellowship—because “you can’t never see one without the other…. And they got that look in dey eye.” Unfortunately, this female preacher is married to a beard of a businessman who has his eyes on another woman—and what de Lawd didn’t tell her is everybody know it.

-Ima-

THINKIN’

R.C. was born in 1929 but he just had his 68th birthday, so how can that be so?

EDITOR’S NOTE: This column is published as political satire, street gossip and humor, and therefore should not be considered as fact but rather as matter of opinion. None of the items therein are collected by the news gathering staff of the Crusader Newspaper Group. Items forwarded to The Chatterbox are kept confidential unless otherwise requested by the author in writing. For submissions please forward to: AChicagoCrusader@aol.com. Original photography and artwork are permitted. Thank you for reading!

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